English Language Article: The inner critic and how to kick his ass.

In his excellent book 'Acting Through Song' Paul Harvard talks of what he calls 'the stranger' - a little voice inside our heads that whispers to us every time we try to do something artistic - like singing a song. Sometimes the critique is positive, but usually it's negative and the incessant monologue of this 'stranger' stops us from living in the present moment because we listen to it just when we should be giving all our attention to the creation of our art ("do you think you'll get that high note in the next verse?", "is the guy scratching his nose in the front row doing that because he's bored?" "you know your voice isn't as good as X's, right?...). This is a major problem, both on stage and in the practice room, simply because our work only exists whilst we are in the process of creating it.

A painter has a durable work of art after he has finished creating it and he is at liberty, should he not like his work, to not exhibit it. Singers, on the other hand, create ephemeral art which only exists whilst we are actively engaged in its creation. Once the last note has been sung and the piano player is clearing away the score (who are we kidding, the piano player is already in the pub) it is too late to go back and change a brush stroke, too late to say 'actually, I don't think that's my best work, I won't share it' - the moment of creation IS the exhibition.

On stage, this means that our performances are undermined by the wretched chatter of this inner critic - whether it's pointing out our flaws or congratulating us on the beautiful note we just produced ('My God, I kick ass - that last note was totally an eargasm - I must remember how I did that so I can do it again... wait, where are we up to....? I swear if that guy in the front row picks his nose one more time...).

In a singing lesson or practice session, the inner critic gleefuly analyses ever little gesture and sound we make, rather than just letting us get on and do it - which is a huge problem because we cannot both give our best attempt at something and perform a detailed real-time analysis of it at the same time.

This 'stranger' then, is at least partly responsible for stage-fright, for less than stellar performances (we've all had those - thank God for single malt...) and for that special kind of hell called 'technical stagnation' where we work on a problem for ages and it doesn't seem to get any better (or it gets better on one day, worse the next, better again and so the cycle continues. And the Stranger loves him some cycle...)

What can we do? Telling your doctor you hear a voice in your head might not be the best route to go down, so here are some techniques that may help you deal with the inner critic and become more objective about your own prowess. If this doesn't help, there's always cake.

1. Be entirely occupied with creation when you are performing. We may feel that our priority should be the audience. We would be wrong - our priority is the creation of our art. The spectators, as their name suggests, are only there to observe that creation. They come second. At least. This probably sounds a little strange, but try simply ignoring the audience for a few months and focussing everything you have on the creation of the art you're supposed to create, rather than that guy scratching his nose in the front row (seriously - is he still doing that? Rude!)
2. Stop giving yourself attention. You should not be focussing on your own person during performances - we all know the feeling of seeing the high note creep nearer as the song advances, but look at it this way : you're either ready or you're not. There's bugger all you can do in that moment to make any difference to that. Focus on something else - the piano, the clock, the upcoming post-concert curry - anything. It doesn't matter.
3. Video every single performance and every single practice session. It's our job to get better and that means we have to play both student and teacher where our own voice is concerned (this is true even if you have a voice teacher - after your lesson you still take over their rôle until you see them again). You can't be both things at the same time, so content yourself with being the singer (student) as you perform / practice, then the teacher when you watch the video later. Audio recordings will not give you enough information. Use video.
4. When you put your teacher hat on and watch the videos, sickeningly new-age twee as it is, write down the positive things as well as the negative. Not because 'universe-love-energy-karma-care bears' or whatever, just because you want to note the things you got right so you can do them again. The things you got wrong, be honest about - write them down, see if you can figure out why, then work on them (and video the work).

Little by little, I believe we can learn to be objective about our own voice and our performances and silencing the inner critic to learn to be our own teacher is a great first step in this.

If it seems like it's all a bit too much work, remember the twee saying loved by Nans and motivational posters the world over :

"If you really want it, you'll find a way, if you don't, you'll find an excuse."

Allan Wright. 16 mars 2014.